Tim Maude Hypnotherapy

Tag: #stress

  • Anxiety In Its Many Forms

    Anxiety In Its Many Forms

    Anxiety manifests itself in many different ways. Some people don’t realise that the cause of their problem are an excess of stress and anxiety. If any of these apply to you, don’t worry – you can get over it. There are many things you can do – hypnotherapy being just one of them.

    Anxiety suffers find that it pops up – sometimes in one way, sometimes in another – and often in many different ways at the same time:

    • There is that feeling of dread when they get up in the morning – a feeling that doesn’t seem to have a trigger. It is just an ordinary day, but when they wake, the feeling of dread is there.
    • Then there is the constant worry. Every little thing seems to be a potential for something that could go wrong. And then if that goes wrong, maybe something else will.
    • And for some, there is a trigger that kicks the anxiety off. Maybe an overwhelming feeling of nervousness when they are about to go and talk to their boss, fly on an airplane, give a talk, drive on a motorway, go on a date … and so on.
    • Some people have physical problems that they don’t even realise is associated with stress and anxiety – digestive problems like IBS, acid reflux and constipation – sexual problems such as loss of libido, erectile dysfunction or vaginismus – migraines, inability to sleep, eczema and so on. Almost any physical problem can be made worse by an excess of stress and anxiety.

    Too many people simply put up with these problems. They hide them from the world behind a mask – that forced smile they use to hold in their emotions. It is important to understand that you can do something about it. It is not permanent.

    I work as a hypnotherapist, every day I help people who are only just coping with anxiety and stress get back to being in control of their lives. It is possible to get over it. Other types of therapy can also be effective. You can get medication from your GP, and you can do a lot simply to help yourself.

    If you are interested in hypnotherapy, you can contact me and I would be pleased to have a chat. I work out of my clinic here in Fleet, Hampshire and also work online.

    Photo by Nicola Crichton at the Mental Health Foundation

  • Anxiety Levels and Our Capacity for Stress

    Anxiety Levels and Our Capacity for Stress

    As I write this blog, the Farnborough Air Show is practising its air displays before the show begins in earnest next week. This all happens a couple of kilometres from my clinic and so I can watch the air displays out of my window. As I watch one aircraft loop-the-loop close to the ground, I wonder at the adrenaline levels of the pilot.

    The stress on the pilot must be enormous – not only do they have to put up with the high G-forces battering their body, they also have to consider the safety of the crowds in the airfield just below them, not to mention their own safety. It is a level of stress that most of us would not be able to tolerate.

    Everyone has a different capacity for stress. For the pilots doing acrobatics in Farnborough – they need to retain total control over their mind and body while undergoing enormous physical and mental stress. You only take a job like that if you have a high capacity for stress. The same goes for people with high pressure jobs – captains of industry, bomb disposal units, prime ministers and so on.

    There are people have a low capacity for handling stress – people who go to pieces when even under the smallest amount of pressure. Most of us are in between these two extremes.

    Of course, our capacity for handling stress affects anxiety. If you have a low tolerance for stress – your “stress bucket” will fill up fast. Once your stress bucket starts to fill, the fight-or-flight centre of the brain starts to take over, and you feel that sense of anxiety. This does not mean that someone with a higher capacity for stress will not develop anxiety – it just that they will tolerate more stress before the anxiety starts to take over.

    So what is the take-away from all this?

    It is simply that we all need to recognise that, just because someone else can handle a lot of stress – it does not mean that you have to. The opposite is also true: just because someone else cannot handle a lot of stress, it does not mean that you can’t either.

    Our reaction to stress is an individual thing. We all need to learn what our own limits are, what we can do, what we can’t, and where the balance lies. If you find something that stresses you too much – do less of it. If you find something you can do that works – do more of it.

    And Finally …

    If you need help with your levels of stress and anxiety … if you want to get back in control of your life again … contact me … I will be happy to have a chat, and if you want the services of a good qualified hypnotherapist to help, I work out of my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire and would be happy to help.

    Photo by Aleksandar Pasaric on Pexels

  • Walking Away After Injustice Strikes

    Walking Away After Injustice Strikes

    We all have an inbuilt sense of justice and we feel aggrieved or angry when we see injustice. It could be something small like the person that jumps ahead of you in the queue at the local shop. Or it could be something large like the person that walks out on a relationship to be with someone else.

    These injustices are things that cannot be resolved simply. You cannot make the queue-jumper go to the back of the queue, and even if you could, you would still feel the anger towards them. You cannot make your partner come back to you and remove all memory of them being with someone else.

    We cannot undo injustice, but we can leave it in the past and not allow it to continue to cause us stress and anger – which feeds our anxiety. It is not easy to let go of injustice – to say to ourselves, “That was wrong, but it’s all gone now, so now I can start looking forward to making a better future.” Nevertheless, that is exactly what you have to do to avoid feeding the anxiety.

    If someone does an injustice towards you, then it was their choice to behave like that – not yours. Your choice is whether to let them annoy you or not. You have the ability to simply walk away.

    And Finally …

    If you feel anxiety as a result of someone doing you an injustice, or for any other reason, then I can help you get through it. I use the power of hypnotherapy to help people with anxiety get back in control of their lives and move on. I work from my clinic here in Fleet, Hampshire and also online. Contact me if you would like to discuss things.

    Photo courtesy of the Mental Health Foundation

  • Don’t Forget to Smell the Roses

    Don’t Forget to Smell the Roses

    The roses in my garden are coming out and filling the air with perfume. But as I rush to my clinic in the garden, I don’t notice them. I am too much in a hurry in case I am not ready for my first client. I am more motivated because I don’t want to be late than I am to appreciate the roses.

    So what motivates you?

    Motivation can work in two different way – towards or away-from. Towards-motivation is all about doing something because you want something positive … “I will go to the supermarket because I would really like a nice lasagne tonight and I need the ingredients.” Whereas away-from-motivation is all about getting away from something negative … “I will go to that meeting because I don’t want to be told off by my boss.”

    Anxiety works on the away-from motivation. It focuses attention on all the things that could possibly go wrong. Anxiety is a primitive survival mechanism that does not care how you feel – it only cares that you survive. That is why, when you are anxious, you find yourself automatically focusing on stuff that is or might go wrong.

    Focusing on things that might go wrong then feeds the anxiety mechanism even more. It is a self-fulfilling loop.

    In order to help break this vicious circle, spend time actively looking our for the good things in life – no matter how small. Take time to smell the roses.

    Photo by Živa Trajbarič on Pexels

  • How Does Honesty Help with Anxiety?

    How Does Honesty Help with Anxiety?

    Honesty and Anxiety – two strange bedfellows – why would I even mention them in the same sentence. And that is what I thought too, until I started to think about it.

    I am currently reading Dopamine Nation by Anna Lembke. It is all about addiction (another branch of my work in hypnotherapy), explaining how the neurotransmitter dopamine effects the brain, and what happens when we become addicted to something. I can relate to it, as I recognise a time when I was addicted to coffee. (Thankfully, I managed to get over it.)

    I was surprised to find a chapter of the book on honesty. As Lembke points out, honesty is one of the tried and tested mantras of alcoholics anonymous (step 5 in AA’s 12 steps). It turns out that being honest about an addiction is a very important point in overcoming it. Being honest means being honest with your family, friends and above all, yourself.

    So I set to thinking, how does this relate to my anxiety clients. I realised that many of my clients are more honest with me than they are to even their closest friends and family. They tell me about their thoughts and feelings as well as the awful things that have happened to them in their lives. And telling me about all the bad times they have had seems to give a cathartic sense of relieve – even if just for a short time.

    And I always encourage them to be honest about where they want to be (indeed, who they want to be) in the future. This has an even greater effect on reducing anxiety levels.

    For those who are embarrassed by their anxiety, or who don’t want to burden their family with it, or who simply follow the social convention of not telling other people about our own problems – hiding their anxiety feelings simply adds another layer of stress. They have to make excuses; they find themselves forcing a smile and engaging in social chit-chat while their insides are in turmoil. Hiding anxiety simply adds to it.

    Why the Photo?

    Why the photo at the start of this blog? … No reason other than it’s a plant called “honesty”!!

    And Finally …

    In this blog, I usually try and encourage people to find a way forward by themselves, but if you are struggling with anxiety and want to some help – I help people like you get back in control of their lives. I use the power of hypnotherapy to help my clients get back to a state of normality. You can Contact Me if you want my services. I work in my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire and also online.

    References

    Dopamine Nation
    https://www.annalembke.com/

    AA Twelve Steps
    https://www.aa.org/the-twelve-steps

    Photo by kokokara on Pexels

  • What is a “Normal” Level of Anxiety?

    What is a “Normal” Level of Anxiety?

    Everyone has anxiety sometimes. Reacting to things that are dangerous or potentially dangerous is an important function of the brain. Anxiety is what kept our ancestors alive in the days when the world was more dangerous than it is today. Why? Because anxiety makes you focus on the potential danger and helps you escape.

    Everyone has anxiety sometimes. Step out into the road without looking properly and you might notice a car approaching you at speed. In an instant your whole body is filled with adrenaline and you jump out of the way. You feel a shock of anxiety run through you and a relief as the car rushes past you, leaving you unharmed. This is anxiety doing its job.

    For a wildebeest crossing the Serengeti, anxiety is three minutes of absolute terror as it is being chased by a lion – resulting in either escape or death. For a human being, anxiety can be years and years of worrying that there might not be enough money to pay the rent this month. Both focus on the potential danger, but because of the human being’s ability to imagine the future, anxiety can last for years.

    So what is a “normal” level of anxiety? Of course, there is no “normal”. Everyone is different. For some people, a level of anxiety starts when they wake up each morning and carries on throughout the day. These people have accepted constant anxiety as the norm and do not realise that they can do something about it. Others live a life of calm, only suffering bouts of anxiety when they step out into the road without looking.

    Wherever you are on this spectrum of anxiety – you can do something about it to change. You can move yourself to a calmer, less-anxious life. The next question is – is it worth it? If you are content with your life as it is, then don’t change a thing, but if you even have the smallest dislike about the way you are, then I would recommend you do something about it.

    There are lots of things you can do to improve your mental health (e.g. read this blog article – https://timmaudehypnotherapy.co.uk/2024/03/12/how-to-stay-mentally-fit-the-mental-health-hygiene-triangle/).

    I would wish you all good luck on your journey through life – and luck has a part to play, but you might want to rely on your own efforts to help you on towards a better life.

    And Finally …

    If you struggle to manage your levels of anxiety on your own, you can always get help. I support people with anxiety, helping them get back in control of their lives. I use the power of hypnotherapy from my clinic here in Fleet, Hampshire, or online. Contact me if you are interested.

    Photo courtesy of Mental Health Foundation / Kerry Adams