Tim Maude Hypnotherapy

Author: Tim

  • Winter is Coming: How SAD is That

    Winter is Coming: How SAD is That

    Winter is coming, and fortunately spring comes just after that … but in the meantime, we have to deal with the winter. “Winter” is a word that has been used to signify a downturn in events from everything from Shakespeare to Game Of Thrones. This is because winter can encourage feeling of sadness and depression in some people.

    Seasonal Affective Disorder – SAD

    Seasonal Affective Disorder is a condition in which one feels particularly low during certain seasons (usually the winter). If the individual already has anxiety or depression, SAD will magnify the symptoms. At this time of year, I often see clients who tell me that they always feel bad as the night’s draw in.

    As well as a low mood, symptoms include difficulty concentrating, changes in appetite, changes in the amount of sleep, and a lowering of sex drive.

    The causes are not known, but it is suspected that the change in the amount of daylight hours is a strong contributing factor. Genetics too are a potential cause.

    How Common is SAD

    A 2021 survey of 2,000 adults in the UK suggests that around one in twenty have been diagnosed with SAD, and that about three times as many as that suffer from low moods in autumn and winter (although they don’t know why).

    Official figures from USA suggest that up to 3% of the US population suffer from SAD.

    My personal experience is that: for the people I see in my anxiety clinic, I would expect that SAD symptoms occur more commonly than these figures suggest in people with anxiety.

    Treatment of SAD

    Whether or not someone has been diagnosed with SAD, there are various treatments available. Broadly speaking, these break down as follows:

    • Self-help measures – such as getting out into the natural sunlight as long as you can each day
    • Light therapy – here you need a special light (known as a light box) which simulates natural sunlight – you need to sit in front of this light for some time each day
    • Talking therapy – where you work with a therapist to help you get through the season

    And Finally …

    I help people with anxiety and other mood disorders such as SAD using hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy is a combination of a talking therapy and hypnosis. If cannot manage your symptoms on your own, you can Contact Me and I will be happy to talk to you about what I can offer. I work out of my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire as well as working online.

    References

    NHS overview of seasonal affective disorder – SAD
    https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/seasonal-affective-disorder-sad/overview/

    Mind overview of seasonal affective disorder – SAD
    https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/seasonal-affective-disorder-sad/about-sad/

    Micro Biz Mag SAD survey
    https://www.microbizmag.co.uk/seasonal-affective-disorder-statistics/

    USA National Library of Medicine over view of SAD
    https://medlineplus.gov/genetics/condition/seasonal-affective-disorder/

    Photo by Erik Mclean on Pexels

  • Can You Play the Guitar While You Are Overwhelmed?

    Can You Play the Guitar While You Are Overwhelmed?

    “Overwhelmed” is a word that I often hear in my clinic. “My anxiety is overwhelming.” “My mind is overwhelmed with thoughts of what might go wrong.” “I have so many things that need sorting that my brain feels overwhelmed with worry.”

    People who are overwhelmed with anxiety sometimes tell me that they have stopped doing the things they enjoy – like playing the guitar. Anxiety and being overwhelmed seem to go hand in hand.

    Why is Anxiety Overwhelming?

    The primitive part of our brain that is there to help us survive in the wild world of our ancesters will always keep our mind focused on things that might go wrong. It doesn’t care about how we feel or whether we are leading a satisfying life – it only cares about survival. And so … it gets us to think about things that might be a danger.

    In a world where there is hardly any life-threatening danger, this primitive part of the brain latches on to smaller things that might go wrong – being late for work, worry that other people may be thinking bad things about you, concern that you may have missed out on the latest social media posting and so on.

    Why do we Stop Playing the Guitar?

    If someone is particularly stressed, they will be reminded again and again about what could go wrong – so much that it becomes overwhelming. It also works the other way round – if someone has a lot going on in their lives and they are constantly thinking about it, then it can result in anxiety.

    When someone is overwhelmed, they may stop doing the things that they enjoy. Whether it’s to stop playing the guitar, stop reading or stop going for a walk – it all comes about because that primitive part of the brain keeps telling us to get on with the things that need doing, or it makes us anxious about the problems in life.

    How Can Playing a Guitar Help With Being Overwhelmed?

    Ironically, even though that primitive part of the brain is trying to stop us playing the guitar when we are overwhelmed, it is playing the guitar that will help calm the overwhelmed feeling down.

    When we have a pastime that absorbs our minds completely, that primitive part of the brain that is the source of all the problems calms down a bit. When you are so focused on getting the right chords, or have totally absorbed yourself in watching a film, or you are determined to complete the last set of bench presses in the gym – that is the time when you deliberately focus your attention on what is happening in the moment.

    The anxiety that results from being overwhelmed – or indeed, the overwhelm that results from anxiety – is looking at the dangers that might happen in the future, or regretting the problems that have already gone. So finding an activity that focuses on the here-and-now forces your mind away from the overwhelming anxiety.

    I am not saying that it is easy to switch off from your problems and focus on the here-and-now. It takes practice, but so does playing the guitar. So start just for a few minutes – or even a few seconds – and then build it up gradually.

    And Finally …

    Here, I offer advice for people who are overwhelmed with anxiety, but if you cannot manage to get it under control by yourself, you might consider getting some help. Every week, I see clients who have difficulties with their stress and anxiety. Using hypnotherapy I help them get back on their feet again. I work out of my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire and also work online. I would be pleased to have a chat – so Contact Me when you are ready to do so.

    Picture courtesy of the Mental Health Foundation / Steve Somerset

  • The Comparison Trap That Feeds Anxiety

    The Comparison Trap That Feeds Anxiety

    Comparing ourselves to others is one way that we increase our stress levels. If you have anxiety, then comparing your situation with that of the people around you will simply make the anxiety worse.

    We learn to compare ourselves with others in our childhood. I remember talking to a friend at school asking, “I got 63% in that exam. What did you get?” … and then feeling a sense of disappointment when he told me that he’d scored more than me. Of course, if he had got less than I had, it would have been the other way around.

    How We Compare Ourselves To Others

    It is easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves with others. Are they richer, luckier, healthier, more beautiful, fitter, stronger, better dressed … and so on? That comparison can create a thought or feeling that we are not good enough.

    In these days of social media, this is amplified, as our friends will mostly post about themselves when they are at their best – when they look their best, when they are on a fantastic holiday, or having a great meal. Added to this, we now have other means of comparing ourselves – the number of friends or followers they have, the number of likes they get for their posts and so on.

    What This Does To Our Subconscious

    When we constantly compare ourselves to others unfavourably – that is, when we constantly see ourselves as somehow inferior to people around us, then we build a belief that we are an inferior person. Subconsciously, we are drawn into noticing more and more people who are richer, luckier, healthier etc. and this re-enforces the idea that we are inferior.

    Feeling inferior and bemoaning the idea that other people are better than us creates stress which is re-enforced each day by seeing more and more people who are some way “better”. Ultimately, this will lead to an increase in anxiety and/or depression.

    The Best Attitude: Be Yourself

    Like everyone else, you are unique! No-one else in the world is exactly like you. So be yourself. Be happy with what you are and with what you have. If you want something else – then strive to get it because you want it – not because you want to be better than someone else.

    The world is not fair. Some people have good health and some don’t; some earn a lot of money and others struggle to get by; some are naturally good looking and others not so. I am sorry that life is not always fair, but that is the way it is. You can stress yourself out about it, or you can enjoy your life as it actually is.

    Once you can accept that you don’t have to live up to the lives of others and you are not inferior to others, your life will be a lot easier. There will be less stress and less anxiety.

    And Finally …

    If you struggle with anxiety and find it difficult to lead normal life on your own, you may like to Contact Me. I help people who are only just coping with stress and anxiety using hypnotherapy to help them regain control of their lives. I work from my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire as well as working online.

    Photo by negar nikkhah on Unsplash

  • Take Control of Your Life with the Three P’s

    Take Control of Your Life with the Three P’s

    There are times in everyone’s life when they seem to loose control. Stress levels hit the roof and they loose a sense of being in control of what is going on. Maybe it is anxiety … maybe it is depression … or maybe there is a simmering anger sitting just beneath the service. It is time to do something about it.

    When you decide it’s time to regain control of your life – you have a number of choices. A lot of people will go to their doctor and get medication. Some will find a therapist to help (I see people every week who have taken this route). And some will look to do something about it themselves.

    The Three P’s

    If you want to do something about it yourself, one of the best ways to normalise your brain is to adopt the 3 P’s into life. You don’t have to have lost control of your life before you start doing this. In fact, you would be far better off adopting the three P’s just to avoid getting into that state in the first place.

    P1 Positive Thinking

    When everything seems to be going wrong in your life, it becomes very easy to focus on the negative. We notice everything that seems to be conspiring against us. Our brains automatically bring our attention to things that are not working for us.

    It takes effort, but if you can deliberately identify the positive things that are happening to you, no matter how small, you can start to regain control of your thinking. Notice even the little things – a nice cup of coffee, a greeting from the person checking out your groceries at the supermarket, or the warmth of the bed as it gradually warms up when you snuggle down under the duvet.

    P2 Positive Action

    It is easy, particularly when you are feeling down, to resort to doing something mindless, like slumping in front of the TV, or endlessly scrolling through your phone. These are little distractions that block out all the negative things that are going on in our minds.

    Instead, make the effort to do something positive. It does not have to be much. Maybe get up and make a cup of tea, go for a walk, or do that household job that you have been putting off for so long. Just go and do it. Taking positive action and doing something that will make your life a bit easier gets your subconscious to realise that it can do something about the situation you are in.

    P3 Positive Interaction

    How often have you avoided talking to other people, just because it’s too much effort. When we are feeling low, our automatic reaction is to avoid other people – or seek out other people to tell them all about our problems.

    It is that positive interaction with others that helps you get back in control. So have a chat with a neighbour when you bump into them on your street, talk with the people around you at work, or go out with friends. Talk to other people about what is good in your life.

    Putting It All Together

    When you have this positive interaction with others, do things that positively affect your life and think positively – when the three P’s are all in play – the chemical balance in your brain will undergo changes. These changes tend to lead to a sense of more control in your life, and your life becomes happier.

    And Finally …

    For some, this is all too hard or takes to long and they want a quicker solution. Hypnotherapy is just one of several therapies known to help. I work as a hypnotherapist in Fleet, Hampshire and would be pleased if you Contact Me – but only when you are really ready to do so!

    Picture Courtesy of Claire Harvey

  • Not Going Out: Agoraphobia Problems and Solutions

    Not Going Out: Agoraphobia Problems and Solutions

    Some people have restricted lives because of a strong sense of anxiety that comes over them in unfamiliar places. Even the thought of going into a different shop can fill them with anxiety. This can be devastating to their lives, but it is quite possible to overcome it. Hypnotherapy is just one of the possible routes to choose to be able to lead a normal life again.

    What is Agoraphobia?

    Many people feel a sense of unease if they have to go to a place which they don’t know. If this feeling is too strong, they may find it easier to restrict where they go to. If it becomes stronger still, the sense of unease may turn into anxiety, fear and panic, and they stop travelling outside of their comfort zone.

    I have seen people in my hypnotherapy clinic who feel restricted about where they go. They may, for example, only go to work and to the local shops, but otherwise stay at home. In the worst case scenario, they may find themselves unable to go out of doors.

    Should You Do Something?

    This sense of unease or fear about going outside of familiar locations is known as agoraphobia. It is not uncommon to have a slight apprehension about going to an unfamiliar place, and as long as this is not restricting what one does in life, it is not a problem.

    It is a problem if the anxiety stops someone doing what they really want to. When it starts interfering with life, when they feel restricted about where they can go – that is the time to think about doing something about it.

    What Can You Do About Agoraphobia?

    My clients tell me how the anxiety they feel is irrational – and they are quite right. The anxiety they experience when going away from familiar places comes from a subconscious part of the brain. The subconscious has somehow got things wrong. It is trying to keep them away from places which are, in fact, quite safe, and it does this by generating fear and anxiety.

    Hypnotherapy helps change erroneous patterns that are held deep in our subconscious. The anxiety does not disappear overnight, and the hypnotherapy can only help if someone really wants to change.

    For some people, even the thought of travelling to a hypnotherapist is overwhelming. However, with modern technology, hypnotherapy can work well by using a video link, such as Zoom, so people can stay at home until they are sufficiently relaxed to be able to attend sessions in person.

    Hypnotherapy is not the only way to get over agoraphobia. Other methods, such as CBT can help as well.

    What Next?

    If you suffer from anxiety, brought on by agoraphobia or anything else, you can Contact Me. I am a hypnotherapist working in Fleet, Hampshire as well as online. I would be happy to help you regain control of your life.

    Photo by Fons Heijnsbroek on Unsplash

  • Anxiety Behind the Wheel – a Common Complaint

    Anxiety Behind the Wheel – a Common Complaint

    George was driving on a motorway and feeling a tension creep into his body, as he noticed a fear starting to rise. As he gripped the steering wheel even more tightly, he felt as if a fog had descended into his mind, and the fear gradually took over. He stayed in his lane, tailing a slow-moving lorry to the next exit, thinking that this would be the last time he would ever drive on a motorway.

    Anxiety While Driving

    George is not a real person, but his experience is not as rare as you might think. There are many people out there who find their lives restricted because of anxiety and fear at the thought of driving on motorways and main roads.

    A survey by Aviva in 2023 found that a surprising one-in-seven motorists report having anxiety that affects their driving. These motorists report physical symptoms such as rapid heartbeat, sweating, nausea, chest pains and difficulty breathing. The technical term for this problem is Vehophobia.

    Note: If you have anxiety about driving that might affect the safety of yourself, passengers or other road users, the law requires you to inform the DVLA.

    How Hypnotherapy Can Help With Vehophobia

    When someone is so anxious that they avoid driving on motorways or main roads, or maybe only drive on roads they are familiar with, this restricts what they can do in life. Among my hypnotherapy clients have been people who are too anxious to drive to visit their elderly relatives, who only travel on minor roads, and even those who can no longer drive to work without what seems like a major trauma.

    Hypnotherapy engages their subconscious mind to enable it to gradually accept driving as something normal. In my experience, this does not happen overnight; it takes a few weeks of regular hypnotherapy sessions for the subconscious to become calmer about driving. Of course, there are people for whom hypnotherapy is inappropriate, and so there are other options, such as CBT.

    Hypnotherapy works by engaging the subconscious, along with taking on tasks that each client chooses with the help of the hypnotherapist.

    The Outcome

    Imagine the difference it would make to someone’s life, once they are able to drive freely on any motorway and road in a state of relaxed alertness. For many, this can open up the possibilities of their once-restricted lives. It provides a sort of freedom from the restrictions imposed on them by their vehophobia. It opens up their world.

    What Next …

    If you feel you need help in overcoming anxiety over driving, you can Contact Me and I will be glad to talk. I operate my hypnotherapy clinic in Fleet Hampshire as well as working online.

    References

    Aviva Anxiety Survey

    https://www.aviva.com/newsroom/news-releases/2023/06/one-in-seven-motorists-say-anxiety-affects-their-driving/

    Hypnotherapy to help tackle driving anxiety

    https://www.hypnotherapy-directory.org.uk/memberarticles/driving-anxiety-can-hypnotherapy-help

    Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash