Comparing ourselves to others is one way that we increase our stress levels. If you have anxiety, then comparing your situation with that of the people around you will simply make the anxiety worse.
We learn to compare ourselves with others in our childhood. I remember talking to a friend at school asking, “I got 63% in that exam. What did you get?” … and then feeling a sense of disappointment when he told me that he’d scored more than me. Of course, if he had got less than I had, it would have been the other way around.
How We Compare Ourselves To Others
It is easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves with others. Are they richer, luckier, healthier, more beautiful, fitter, stronger, better dressed … and so on? That comparison can create a thought or feeling that we are not good enough.
In these days of social media, this is amplified, as our friends will mostly post about themselves when they are at their best – when they look their best, when they are on a fantastic holiday, or having a great meal. Added to this, we now have other means of comparing ourselves – the number of friends or followers they have, the number of likes they get for their posts and so on.
What This Does To Our Subconscious
When we constantly compare ourselves to others unfavourably – that is, when we constantly see ourselves as somehow inferior to people around us, then we build a belief that we are an inferior person. Subconsciously, we are drawn into noticing more and more people who are richer, luckier, healthier etc. and this re-enforces the idea that we are inferior.
Feeling inferior and bemoaning the idea that other people are better than us creates stress which is re-enforced each day by seeing more and more people who are some way “better”. Ultimately, this will lead to an increase in anxiety and/or depression.
The Best Attitude: Be Yourself
Like everyone else, you are unique! No-one else in the world is exactly like you. So be yourself. Be happy with what you are and with what you have. If you want something else – then strive to get it because you want it – not because you want to be better than someone else.
The world is not fair. Some people have good health and some don’t; some earn a lot of money and others struggle to get by; some are naturally good looking and others not so. I am sorry that life is not always fair, but that is the way it is. You can stress yourself out about it, or you can enjoy your life as it actually is.
Once you can accept that you don’t have to live up to the lives of others and you are not inferior to others, your life will be a lot easier. There will be less stress and less anxiety.
And Finally …
If you struggle with anxiety and find it difficult to lead normal life on your own, you may like to Contact Me. I help people who are only just coping with stress and anxiety using hypnotherapy to help them regain control of their lives. I work from my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire as well as working online.
Photo by negar nikkhah on Unsplash