Let me ask you a question: What is your reaction when your plans are disrupted? You know what you want to do, but someone or something unexpectedly stops you.
The other day, I went out on an errand in the car for a couple of hours, and when I got back, the end of my road was blocked off. A notice said, “Road closed – please find an Alternative Route” and I couldn’t get to my house. So I drove round the streets until I got to the other end of my street. A few yards up that way was another notice: “Road closed – please find an Alternative Route”. Both routes to my home had been blocked off.
Let me ask you that question again: What is your reaction when your plans are disrupted? Do you get angry. Do you swear? Do you shout at the people who are preventing you from carrying on? Do you quietly fume, holding it all in? … If you do any of these, you are simply adding to your stress. No matter how indignant you feel, developing that righteous anger will not make the situation any better.
I found a place to park on the street some way off, and walked home. If something upsets my plans, I put it aside and find a way round the problem. I have learnt not to get angry, or tense. I just say, “It is what it is and there is nothing I can do about it.”
You see, getting angry, upset or stressed when someone or something upsets your plans is a response that you have when you already have a lot of stress in your life. When your “stress bucket” is already full, adding another difficulty will push you into anger, anxiety, depression or some other negative emotion. Of course, the negative emotion does not help solve the problem.
Later on that day, the workmen had gone and I walked back to the car and drove it home. I looked for the positives: 1) I got an additional walk in the fresh air, 2) the pot holes at the end of the road were (at last) filled in, and 3) I got an idea and a photo for this blog.
So if your road is blocked, don’t get mad, simply find an alternative route.
And Finally …
I have just made a very glib statement – “simply find an alternative route.” I know that it is not that easy for some people, especially those suffering from anxiety. I help people with anxiety using hypnotherapy to help them regain normality in their lives. You can Contact Me if you want to find out more about how I can help you.