For many years now, I have taken people into a nice relaxed state in my hypnotherapist’s chair. People who suffer from anxiety, worry, depression … people who lack confidence or have been overwhelmed by their own particular situation. They all find they are able to lie back and completely relax in a nice hypnotic trance.
So why can’t they do it at home, at work or in their everyday lives?
What is Relaxation?
We all have things that are going on in our lives. We think about what we’ve done and about what we are going to do. Just thinking about everything that you have to do today will get your brain starting to plan – what to do first, what you will need to do it, how long it might take and so on.
Already, your brain is active and it will start to prepare your body for whatever it is you are thinking about. Your muscles start to tense, quite unconsciously, as your subconscious anticipates what you are going to do.
So when you think about what you are going to do, or worry about what might happen at some point in the future, you are not relaxed.
Likewise, if you ruminate about the past – thinking about all those things that went wrong, or at least not as you had hoped, your subconscious will start to tense up your muscles again, in anticipation that it might happen again.
It is only when your mind is free from worry, free from regret, free from every little concern that you can truly relax. It’s at times when you are not thinking about the problems you might have in the future, or the problems you have had in the past that you can let your mind be free.
Simply enjoying the moment, whether it’s getting absorbed in a book, walking in the woods, having a laugh with friends, free from everything except what is right in front of you right now – that is relaxation.
Why Can’t I Be Relaxed All the Time?
If you were totally relaxed all the time, you would be unlikely to achieve anything or learn anything.
You have to think about problems you have had in the past, in order to learn from them. Once you have learnt from them, there is no need to think about them any more.
You have to think about what you are going to be doing, and anticipate problems, otherwise you would not be able to plan to overcome them.
There is a time to work and a time to relax. The trick is to get the right balance between them.
How Can I Relax?
Learning to relax takes time if you are not used to it. Set aside some time to relax each day. If you are not used to it, you may find all sorts of thoughts popping into your head. When this happens, just note them down so you can deal with them at an appropriate time and get back to your relaxation.
Find something to do that you enjoy, and spend the time focusing your mind on the enjoyment of the activity – whether it is lying down on the sofa, going down the gym or enjoying a cup of coffee. Focus your attention on what you are doing in the here-and-now.
And Finally …
I help people who are overwhelmed with life. I use hypnotherapy to help them learn to relax and get their lives back in control again. I work at my clinic in Fleet, Hampshire and also online. If you want to talk about something, you can Contact Me for a chat.
Photo courtesy of Mental Health Foundation / Niccii Kearns